September 14, 2008

Two Bits

A quick glance at my profile will tell you that I have 4 sons. When they were little we did what most parents do and potty-trained them. To the best of my knowledge, they are still potty-trained.

So as not to embarrass any of them, the protagonist in this story shall remain anonymous. (See Alex, I know one or two 4 syllable words!) (More than likely I'm using "protagonist" incorrectly, but it's the thought that counts, right?)

Anyway-when we were in the trenches of potty-training one of them, we tried a number of tricks to get "him" to "perform". We tried leaving some good books in the bathroom. Not tempting enough. We tried peanuts as a bribe. He laughed. Raisins got a snort. Finally, in desperation I caved and bought some M & M's. Wow! What a difference! That kid had to go every few minutes! He loved those M & M's.

After he had mastered #1, we moved on to #2. #2 warranted two M & M's every time he went. I've never seen anyone able to go on demand before, but this kid was able to figure it out just so he could increase his sugar intake.

One afternoon I was busy doing whatever it is a mom does, when my little guy came running. He was thrilled about something.

"Mommy! I pooped two bits! A big bit and a little bit!"


  1. Hilarious!!!! Thanks for the smile (and laugh) to start off my day! Too much fun.

  2. LOL! Gotta love those embarrassing childhood stories. Too cute!

  3. SO CUTE! We caved and used the M&M trick with our third and it worked for her, too. She still asks for one occasionally and i can't look at that candy without thinking of her or her potty-training shenanigans!

  4. So how many M&Ms did he get that time? We're in the midst of the potty training and its dragging on forever (or at least it seems that way to me right now!). Right now we're doing Skittles every time he goes #1, and he has a little chart that we use for good behavior and when he gets to the end of the chart he gets a Dollar Store prize. He still doesn't volunteer to go. We have to make him most of the time. He has NO interest in going #2 in the toilet. I'm really tired of hearing him say "you need to change me". ARGH!!

  5. Wani -

    Just threaten to sell the kid on Ebay. That's what I'm going to do with James' kids when he has some.

  6. Hey, you used both tetrasyllabic words properly. Way to go!
    Don't sell yourself short--you are a talented and creative writer. Keep it flowing!
    Finding the balance of clarity is a challenge: "big" complex words that are "just the right one" and can render the phrase precise, and those short and easy words that make the sentence simple to comprehend.
    That said, this was yet another fun story to augment the log of "reasons I wish my mother didn't have a blog" for all 4 of your boys. :)

    Alex :)


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