January 23, 2008

Random Thoughts From A Brain Half-Frozen

Why is it that 68 degrees in July would be a dream come true and 68 in January is misery? I just can't get warm! (That's what we keep our thermostat set at in the winter.) So, I am not only fantasizing about being warm again someday, here are a few of my other fantasies this winter:
-I want to go back to England. I love the Brits. I love their humor. I love their architecture. I love their history and their food. I adore their accent.
-I'd love it if Mike would take the boys camping for a long weekend and "forget" to take me.
-I want to go on one family trip with all 6 of us present and accounted for. I want to take the boys out west and show them Yellowstone, Mount Rushmore, and the Grand Canyon.
-Even though I'm freezing to death and my brain is gelling, I really, really, really want to go see the Himalayan Mountains.
-I'd love a "Pause" button for all the guys in this house. I could aim it at anyone about to make a mess or utter a sound.
- I want 3 years alone with Jesus. I used to be jealous of Paul because of the 3 years he was able to spend alone with the Lord in the desert-now I know better. The bible says that later in his life he was:
beaten times without number
5 times received 39 lashes
often in danger of death
3 times beaten with rods
stoned once
shipwrecked 3 times
spent a night and a day in the water
in danger from rivers
in danger from robbers
in danger from his countrymen
in danger in the city
in danger in the wilderness
he had many sleepless nights
suffered hunger and thirst
cold and exposed

I think the Lord was using that time in the wilderness to prepare Paul for his future. I haven't arrived at the point where I'd willingly go through those things for the sake of the gospel.
However, I am very curious about those 3 years he spent alone with the Lord. Can you imagine what that must have been like? No distractions. No interruptions. Just sweet time with Jesus, sitting at His feet and learning, learning, learning. Having your heart set on things above. Getting the Big picture, and seeing life from God's perspective. My brain and heart explode with questions about Paul's experience, but I can't get those thoughts put into words.
I do know that I'm not always jealous of Paul. There are so many times I let anything and everything get in the way of the time I could spend with Jesus. Maybe what I'm jealous of is Paul after he had those 3 years alone with Jesus.
His focus was constant. He did see the big picture.
-I want my heart to want Him.


  1. Well, guess we'll have to settle for eternity ;) Only, we won't have to wrangle with sin and such...

    But, I know what you mean (as I sigh...)

  2. As I nod my head along in agreement. Yep, yep, and yep. As for the pause button remote control- you are far nicer than I am. I've contemplated a taser to zap my mess makers. ;-P

  3. While we don't actually KNOW what happened with Paul during those three years, I think it's safe to say that the Lord used that time to thump him around a little and straighten it out. So, my guess is that Paul didn't enjoy it while he was experiencing it, but I'm sure he looked back on it with awe. But I'm not so certain that we have to be physically alone to experience what Paul experienced.

  4. I was thinking of that exact thing with the temperature yesterday. It is a weird phenomenon. Remember when it was in the forties and fifties outside last week. It felt almost balmy outside to me. But in the summer, I would be freezing outside at those temperatures. Weird.

    I like your list of things you'd like to do. "Forget" to take you! HAHA! What's the deal with Ben going camping by himself in these cold temperatures? He reminds me of Paul...sitting alone at the feet of Jesus. I do think of Paul and all he went through. I think that he couldn't have "sat at the feet of Jesus" like that if he had kids. I think that's one reason why he says it is better not to marry if you are gifted that way. Gives you food for thought.


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